Why does my girlfriend not want to have sex

It is only when the spontaneous frenzy of first lust subsides that sex becomes a process that requires initiation and, more often than not, it is the man who makes the first move. In my survey of more than 3, people, The discrepancy is partly explained by the fact that men generally have higher libidos than women, but it also reflects gendered expectations about men appearing to take the lead role. Unsurprisingly, Saturday night and Sunday morning are peak times for domestic sex so, next weekend, when you experience that early morning urge, resist the temptation to roll over to her side of the bed and see whether she will voluntarily attend to your needs. It also ignores the rather obvious fact that male sexual desire is responsive, too, and if, every now and again, your girlfriend took charge, she would undoubtedly trigger feelings of arousal in you, too.

Over a third of British women in a relationship do not have interest in sex. Photo: Shutterstock. Are the results from a recent BMJ Open study really that surprising? So much for the belief that every relationship is perfect all the time.

Second of all, each one of us is responsible for getting our own needs met—including our sexual needs. You are responsible for getting your needs and yourself off. No one likes to be told no when all they want to do is have sex with the person they care about. She is clearly denying something. It could be her feelings for you, it could be her feelings for herself or it could be something else.

If communication if the key to a good relationship, then surely it is also the shortcut to a fulfilling sex life within said relationship? That's easier said than done when it comes to being open about your desires if you feel they aren't the same as your partner. This might mean feeling rejected because you feel you're always the one trying to get something going, or inadequate because you don't feel you can fulfil the needs of your partner. There's no need to feel guilt or shame about having a different sex drive to the person you're with, we all have very different libidos which are constantly fluctuating, so it is only natural that a lot of relationships will end up with conflicting sexual desires.